The "D" Word

Day Care. We have looked to this week with dread over the past several months since Nori was born. It was a comfort in the beginning, knowing that it was far, far away, when she turned 6 months old -that she would start day care. It was a "good idea" that would work for our schedules and in theory we liked the facility. But as the weeks went by the "D" word started to turn my stomach and there was lots of underlying anxiety. Why on earth were we going to pay to leave her with someone that we don't even know? I went to visit about a month ago, supposedly to make me feel better, and after being in a room of 15 snotty kids I came running home telling Nori (or more accurately myself) that we don't have to go back there.
Side note: why is it that other kids' snot and drool is so gross and Nori's isn't?!
In the meantime, we found out that the rates went up more than 10% from what we agreed to when we signed up, and that we had to pay an extra insurance fee. Was it really worth it? I called current parents at the center for references and I heard nothing but rave reviews, one parent actually sent their second and third kids there at a younger age than the first because of the benefits to their development. This guy talked my ear off for an hour about how much he liked the place. I just needed someone, even perfect strangers, to tell us that we were doing the right thing. I kept thinking, in a few years I will be one of these parents raving to a new mom about the daycare, but I just couldn't imagine it. Last week I started looking desperately for other day cares- why? because I wanted every excuse or distraction from the reality that she was starting this week.
So, June 28th came at last and my prayer was "God, tell me we are making the right decision, but only if we really are, not just because I want to feel okay, but I do want to feel okay." The stomach butterflies didn't go away. . .It felt like the I was five and going to kindergarten for the first time (my sister can vouch for how that went.)
But today, Friday, the last day of her "transition week" I can happily report the butterflies are all but gone. Peace is near! The transition week started with Pete and I going with her for two days, then slowly increasing the hours. This helped Nori I think, but the real transition is for us. I can almost feel myself transition, from the first day of only seeing snot, strangers, and lack of attention to now smiling at the caregivers (instead of glaring the mama bear "don't touch my baby" look) and not feeling like I will throw up. I know most of the other kids' names and getting to know a few parents. The smell is becoming familiar as well as the noise level. Hmmm, I am having flashbacks to my kindergarten room again.
My biggest anxiety was whether she would nap well with all the noise. She has gone from a 5 minute nap the first day to two hours yesterday! I am so proud of her you would think she just got into Harvard. And I am pretty proud of us, too.